"What if" is a phrase that has been a big part of my adult life that has invaded my mind on an almost daily basis. We all have those thoughts. "If I had only...." or "I should have...". And those thoughts can be very taxing on one's spirit. I know that they are taxing on my spirit. Well, they used to be. I work very hard at not getting myself caught up in things that might have been had I done this or behaved that way. While that does take a great deal of effort, I have learned that by not allowing those feelings to infiltrate my life I feel better. While I know that I cannot change the things that I have done in the past which I am not proud of, I can acknowledge them and move on. After all, those things made me the person that I am today. And I am proud of who I am today.
For me personally, I feel that I came to this resolution late in life but in all honesty there really is not a defined timeline for such things. And now that I am to this point, I can move forward in positive ways. Now when one of those thoughts creep into my conscience, I recognize it and use it for something positive in my life. When I think "well, I should have done this", I will then take that thought and repurpose it into something like "well, because I didn't do that then, now I'm doing this which is what I want to do now." It may be hard to understand what I am trying to say but it all makes sense in my head.
"What ifs" are a natural part of our mental health. I am simply taking mine and making something good out of them. That is all.
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