Quote

"Do not act as if you were going to live ten thousand years.  Death hangs over you.  While you live, while it is in your power, be good."

Marcus Aurelius

Thought for the day

Well, today is day 2 of my last semester of undergraduate.  Yesterday I was back at my internship all day.  I enjoyed being back.  I really do love the residents that I work with.  My field instructor is great too as are all of the other employees.  In some ways, I'm sad because I fit in there well and it will be hard to say goodbye at the end of the semester.  But, other wonderful adventures are ahead of me so this too shall pass.

This morning I woke up feeling almost overwhelmed already.  I don't know if it's because this is my last semester being in school for awhile or what.  But, I cannot let that deter me.  I have to keep focused.  So, this semester is going to be a good exercise in balance in my life.  I want to, and will, succeed in my education but I also want to have a good home and social life.  Sometimes in life I get so focused on one thing that I ignore the others.  And I know, from personal experience, that I do better when my life is well rounded.

It will take me a while to get into this routine of balance.  I'll probably have it down pat by the end of the semester haha.  But, better late than never I suppose!  I can do this.  I got this!

Cheers

Thought for the day

Well, I did better than I expected on not using technology for an entire day.  I didn't go technology free, but there was a definite difference and, more importantly, I liked it.  I did my usual morning routine of checking my email, facebook and doing an online crossword puzzle.  Michael had to work very late the night before, so I didn't want to do anything to make too much noise.  I got Squirt out on a good walk before getting ready for church.  I was afraid I would spend the entire day at the computer because Michael worked again yesterday and I did not have any plans.  Luckily, the sofa was calling my name and I took a delicious nap for a few hours listening to some wonderful classical music on the radio.  I'd forgotten how comfortable Grandmother's sofa is.  I think I've found my new napping spot!

Anyway, it was just nice to do some other things besides staring at my computer or my phone.  I watched some great vintage tv, made dinner, visited with Lois next door and watched Victoria on PBS last night....all without my phone or computer.  It was liberating.  I do recognize the fact that I use my technology and that I truly do need it.  I've come to rely on it for many things.  But, the bottom line is that I don't have to rely on it for everything.

That is all.

Thought for the day

I have come to the conclusion that technology will always be a part of my life.  Not that it hasn't always been a part of my life, just not in the form of computers per say.  Now that computers are everywhere there's no getting away from them really. And I have come to the conclusion that that is fine.  It is what it is and there's no sense in trying to change that.  However, I am all for using it less.  I won't ever give it up because I do enjoy its conveniences.  It is a great way to keep up with people...not the only way, but a great way none the less.  And, after being back in school, I know for a fact that doing research is a lot easier than it use to be!

Take bills for example.  I only pay about half of my bills online and that is purely out of convenience.  The others I pay the old fashioned way, with a check.  A CHECK?!!  What's that?  Who writes checks anymore on a regular basis?  Who?  This guy LOL  I do this because I feel like I am keeping more people employed by writing a check than paying online.  Someone has to print the check, the mailman has to deliver it, someone has to make the stamps, someone has to process the check, etc.  Whether or not that's true, it's how I see it and do not foresee changing that anytime soon!

Anyway, I have decided that I need to take at least one day a week and go off the grid.  I can be so bad about getting sucked into the internet on my computer or my phone that I feel like I am missing out on things sometimes.  I know that I cannot survive my entire life without them, but surely I can make it one day a week.  Yes, I will still use the phone for actual phone calls on that day, but that's going to be it.  Part of the reason for that is today's weather.  It's 70 in January.  Beautiful outside, even though it'll probably snow again next week....you just never know in this state LOL  Anyway, I should be out enjoying this day, but here I sit, ironically, at the computer typing about going off of the grid.  I'd much rather be listening to music on the porch with Squirt.  I just think that letting go of technology for one day a week will get me doing things and going places and getting in touch with people. That is all.  Life's too short not to make the most of it.

As for now, I'm going back to the porch with my dog.

Cheers

showtune of the day - Anthem (Chess)

I love this song and it just seems to resonate to a lot these days.

I remember seeing this show at CPCC Summer Theatre.  It was pretty fun and had some great cast members in it. Of course, David Carroll, who first sang this role in America, died several years after this recording so it's bittersweet.  Still, Chess is a score to be enjoyed totally!

Thought for the day - cleaning the house

Today is one of my last day's off for awhile.  I start back to my final semester next week which I'm very excited about!  So, today I'm going to try to get some more things done around the house.  We'll see how that goes.  I always seem to start out with the best of intentions, but then get caught up in doing nothing.  Oh well, haha.

Anyway, one of the things I want to start working on today is cleaning the house.  And there are several things I mean by that.  One is that I need to keep up more with my cleaning.  I know there are many people who find it a waste of time to constantly be cleaning up things, but I believe that it will do me good.  I spent a lot of time over my break reminiscing over places when I was a child and I want my house to be like that.  Everything had its place and it was, most times, always ready for company...expected or unexpected.  That is one of my goals for this year.  I want my house to be a "destination" house.  I think it would do both myself and Michael a lot of good to have more people in our lives, physically, in real time and not just on the internet....but that does play an important part in our lives as well.  I would just love for people to be able to just stop by spur of the moment and have a house presentable.  This may sound crazy to some, but it would be beneficial to me.  We had some people over for Sunday dinner this week and had to clean more than usual just because we live like slobs sometimes.  And that does not make me happy to be 42 and live in a pig sty....even though I love pigs haha!  We have a great house and it's time we start using it and all that is in it.

Which brings me to #2.  Yes, I already know this and have said it many times, but I have too much stuff.  I love my things but there's just too many of them.  Our garage is jam packed and we can't use it for anything besides storage.  It is time for me to start going through them, again, and getting rid of things.  I did some of that last year and it felt good.  I've decided not to sell them if I can help it.  I would love to give them to people who will use them and cherish them.  I remember when my love for antiques began as a young child.  There was always such a thrill when I'd find a treasure at Goodwill or when Grandmother or Aunt Billie would give me something to add to my collection.  Maybe there's a young person out there beginning their own collection that would enjoy finding one of my treasures in a thrift store.  Or maybe I have friends who collect or friends with children who are interested in these things.  I won't know until I start going through and letting go.

We'll see how all of this plays out.  I have it on my list of things to do to go out to the garage and work for awhile.  Now, if I can tear myself away from the computer, it might just happen today!

Cheers

Old family photos - Edgewood Farms

     I have been obsessed with the family home in Wingate for 30 years now.  And by obsessed, I mean, I have fantasized about living there ever since the family sold it.  I still fantasize about it.  I remember every inch of the house, as it was in the 80's.  Mom wanted to buy the house but Dad was afraid that he would end up spending every free moment of his time working on the house.  In actuality, that probably would have been true, but he also would have had me and Bill to help him with that.  He has said many times that he regrets not buying the property and should've been willing to take more risks.  Ah, well.  What is past is past but one can still fantasize and dream.
     The listing I found online has the build date as 1901, but according to the family it was built in 1897, the same year Uncle John was born.  Whether or not John was born in the house, I do not know.  But it was the birthplace of Aunt Sara (1901), Aunt Billie (1905) and Grandmother (1909).  The house had many acres and was called Edgewood Farms.  The family owned the house until 1987, after Aunt Sara passed away.  It was sold very cheaply to someone who told the family he was going to restore the house but instead he just divided up what land there was and sold the house a few years later.  That's the way it goes sometimes.
     But, I still fantasize about this house all of the time.  I'm not sure if it is still even standing now, but it is emblazoned on my brain forever.  It was interesting to look at the pictures on the listing and see how things had changed and what I remembered.  If I ever win the lottery, I will either buy this house and restore it or build a replica of it somewhere or both.  It's haunted, so I'm not sure that I would personally want to live there, but then again, that could be fun.

     This is the view of the front door from inside the front hall.  The walls are definitely a different color as is the paint job on the door, but everything else is the same.  One of the interesting things about this door, and I found this out years later, is that it is an exact replica of a door in Monroe.  When my great grandfather, J.W. Bivens, was register of deeds and lived in Monroe prior to building this home in Wingate, the family lived in a house on Church Street.  It was at the corner of Church and something I can't remember LOL  Fred McCallum, who worked with my grandfather at the Monroe Hardware Store and was the chairman of Mom's board at United Way, lived in the house when I was in high school.  He and his wife graciously let us tour the home and that's when we discovered it.  The back door of that house was the exact same one as the front door of Edgewood farms.  I'd bet money that's not coincidence.  The only difference in the 2 doors was the doorbell.  One had a push bell, the other a twist but I can't remember which one was which.

     The front hall has the living room, den and main hall off of it.  The main hall has the staircase and the entrances to the master bedroom and dining room.  The above picture is of the back door at the end of the main hall.  I remember that the wall to the left of the door had a huge cedar wardrobe there.  Anytime we would go to pick up Aunt Sara, I was always sent to this door to ring the bell to let her know we had arrived.

     This is the staircase in the main hall.  As most of you know, I do love antiques and that love blossomed when we divided up this estate.  It really is amazing how much stuff can be packed into a space.  On the left wall use to be a stack bookcase and a hall tree.  There was a spinning wheel up against the stairs on the right.  One of the very interesting things about this staircase is that, early on, it faced the other direction.  For whatever reason, maybe during building, they decided to turn the stairs around.  Just to the right of this picture is the door to the master bedroom and over that door is a transom which is of no use because the stairs now block it and you can only see it from inside the bedroom.

     This is the upstairs hallway at the top of the stairs, the door leading to the upstairs bathroom.  I'm not sure if that bathroom was an addition to the house or not.  I do remember Grandmother telling me that when she was a child, they kept borders who were attending the Wingate school.  At dinner time, one particular border would hoist Grandmother up on his shoulders and race down the stairs with her.  There are 4 good sized bedrooms off of this hallway.

    One of the upstairs bedrooms.  Honestly, I'm not sure which one it is.  Two of the bedrooms on one side were connected by a doorway and I cannot tell which one of these openings is the doorway and which is the closet LOL

     Back downstairs, this is the view from the living room, through the front hall and into the den.  I'm pretty amazed that the doors are still there.  There used to be a light fixture hanging in the living room that was original to the house with 2 carnival glass globes on it.  I took those globes off of the fixture, with Mom's permission.  They're now in a china cabinet LOL

    This is the mantle in the den.  This room, at the front of the house, was originally a bedroom where my great great grandmother stayed when the house was first built.  It was also the bedroom in which Grandmother and two of her sisters were born in.  I'm not sure when it was changed over to a den, probably after my great great grandmother passed.  Adjoining it by the door on the left is the master bedroom.

    This is the mantle in the master bedroom.  The walls are quite a different color from when Aunt Sara resided there.  The closet to the left is cedar lined, I remember, with lots of moth balls as well LOL.  On the right of the picture you can see the door into the den.  There's a small shelf on the wall, which I am surprised is still there.  A Seth Thomas clock once sat on that shelf.  The other doorway you can see leads to another small bedroom, pictured below.

     This room began life as a side porch of the house.  There were at least 4 porches around this house.  When my great grandfather came down with TB, the porch was converted into a sleeping porch so that he could have fresh air while he was resting.  I don't know when it was changed over to a regular bedroom, but that is where Aunt Mary Lee stayed when she moved in with Sara in the 70's.  Somewhere I have a wonderful picture of Mary Lee, Grandmother and myself in this room shortly before Mary Lee's death.

     This picture makes me sad because where that "awning" is use to be a beautiful bay window in the dining room.  The deck structure is also new to the home.  I had forgotten about that door that led into the kitchen because it was not used for years and had furniture in front of it inside the kitchen.  The 2 windows on the 2nd story above the dining room housed Aunt Sara's "school room."  She taught first grade for decades at Wingate Elementary school and stored all of her supplies and decorations in that room.  When I was a young child and would visit the house, that was the one door that was always locked.  Actually, it had a padlock on it and no one was ever allowed in there.  Not sure why, but that's the way it was.

All in all, it was, and hopefully still is a beautiful home.  Either way it will still be a cherished memory for me.  And, one day, I hope to have a home just like it.

Thought for the day - faith and reflection

Here it is, Sunday morning.  It's a chilly 15 degrees right now.  It's actually gotten a few degrees warmer since I first got up this morning.  Still, it's pretty cold out there for us here in the south.  I'm enjoying my coffee, as usual, and listening to some records.  I have all of the blinds open this morning because the sun is out and with it reflecting off of all of the snow, it's some pretty nice light.

 Anyway, all church activities for today have been cancelled due to the weather, so now I don't have to try and figure out if I was going to drive or walk this morning.  I did have every intention of making it to service today since holiday travels have kept me from there for a few weeks.  But, I realized, after the fact, that the first thing I did this morning when I woke up was to say a short prayer.  I don't really recall ever having done that before, but there you go.  I slept in today, waking up around 8...which is pretty late for me.  When I opened my eyes and saw the sunlight streaming through the window, I stopped and thanked God for a good night's sleep and for waking up to another day.  Honestly, I don't know why I did this.  It's not something I am in the routine of doing, but it just happened.  I didn't stop to think "I should pray now."  I just did it.  Strange in a way.  Like many people, I tend to pray only when I need something, but not this morning.  Interesting.

I think, for me, what it comes down to is that I am actually thankful for having made it through the night and waking up to another day.  Not that I had anything particular to keep me from waking up, but you never know.  Nothing is guaranteed these days.  And I have made the decision to take advantage of each and every moment.  It's so sad for me to log onto the computer EVERYDAY and see all of these horrible, tragic posts of shootings, murders, etc.  I'm not sure that I believe that there has been an increase in these kinds of events lately or if the fact that we're just made more aware of their existence through social media.  I just don't know as I'm sure these things have been going on my entire life without my knowledge of them.

Ah, but I digress...go figure lol.  I have just come to the conclusion that I cannot live my life in absolute fear of the world.  If I did, I would never leave my house and that's no way to live.  I cannot be afraid of what will be.  I do not know God's plans for my life or even for my day ahead.  I just have to trust and have faith in my beliefs.  I will look not only to God but to the examples set before me by my amazing parents and both grandmothers.  They all experienced, and still do, so much in their lives and have come through almost all of it.  If they can, I can...it's in my blood after all.

I have been reflecting on the last month of holiday activities.  I had a lot of things I wanted to do, but did not get around to.  But, instead of focusing on that, I will look at what I did and do have.  I got to spend time with my amazing family...both the Fornes side and the Abernethy side.  I got to spend time with my "non genetic" family for our Christmas dinner.  I got to sit in my living room and gaze at my tree as I listened to vintage Christmas records.  It's little things like that that make my life special to me.  And that is what I want to focus on, the things that make my life special.  For many people, waking up every day is not particularly special.  But, today, it is special to me and I thank God for that opportunity.

Thought for the day

Sitting here, this morning, having my coffee and pondering life.  2017 is finally here and it could go either way LOL  Last year had lots of ups and downs, so I cannot be one of those people who said it was all bad.  Yes, things happened that I did not like, but I can't change that now.  I can only use those feelings to fuel goodness for this coming year.

Today, my biggest issue is grad school.  I am still on the fence about this.  I eventually want my Master's but do I want it right away?  Part of me is ready to get back into the work force and put my degree to use.  But, part of me really enjoys being a student and I would like to stay in the class room for awhile.  Also I do question if I'm ready to get back to work.  And by that I mean do I have the experience that I think is needed to be a social worker yet?  That I do not know.

And deadlines are coming up.  If I want to do UNCG's grad school, I have to make this decision in the next 24-48 hours because the application is due soon and I still have a lot to get done on that.  That would be a lot of pressure on myself, but you never know.  If I apply and don't get in this time, at least I can see what I need to do to get myself in one day.

And another thing I'm concerned with this is Michael.  He's been working very hard the past few years while I'm in school and I think it's his turn for something new.  Whether it's going back to school himself or looking for employment somewhere else, I feel that he should definitely have a say in what will make up our next few years.

Either way, I will graduate with my BSW this May and that is my most important accomplishment to achieve right now.  Time will tell with everything else.

Cheers

Recipe of the week - lasagna

I love reading older cookbooks.  It is one of my favorite pastimes.  And, as luck would have it, I have quite a few of them thanks to Mom and Grandmother.  I found this recipe for lasagna in one called "Our Best For You" which was published by the Alpha XI Chapter of the Beta Sigma Phi Sorority in Monroe in 1961.  This particular recipe is attributed to Colene Harris.  I tried this recipe just last night for 2 reasons.  One is that I had never before attempted making lasagna and it is, or was, one of the things on my "cooking bucket list".  And, two, it is close to the recipe that Mom used to make.  I don't have a copy of hers and this was close enough that I thought I would try it.  We both ended up liking it, so I hope you do too.  Enjoy!

1 lb ground beef                                      1 14.5 oz can diced tomatoes
1 clove garlic, minced                             1 12 oz can tomato paste
1 tbs. parsley                                           1 box lasagna noodles
1/2 tsp salt

Brown meat.  Add all other ingredients, except noodles, and simmer while preparing rest of recipe.  Cook noodles as package directs.

3 cups cottage cheese                               1/2 tsp pepper
2 eggs, beaten                                           2 tbs parsley flakes
2 tsps salt                                                  1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
8 oz Mozzarella cheese

Mix well the above ingredients except the Mozzarella cheese.  place in large baking dish half the noodles, half the cottage cheese mixture, half the meat sauce, half the Mozzarella.  Repeat.  Bake in preheated oven at 350 for 45 minutes.  Serves 8.

*You can always use more Mozzarella if needed.
**In order not to waste noodles, I make this in 3 layers instead of 2.

Quote

Don't walk behind me; I may not lead.  Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow.  Just walk beside me and be my friend.

Albert Camus

This is a great quote to start off my blog in 2017.  After the last year, I believe that we all need to really cherish and develop our friendships.  They are what get us through the rough times.