Thought for the day - Don't wait until it's too late

Today has been one of those days...rough, reflective days that no one particularly likes but everyone benefits from.  We don't always see that in the moment that it happens, but after the fact, we know it's true.  When I logged onto Facebook this morning, one of the first things I see is a post from my best friend saying that another friend of ours suffered a massive heart attack yesterday.  This is someone who is very loving and giving.  He's so much fun to be around and is the perfect son to his mother.  He actually just came back from a vacation earlier this week.  Needless to say, prayers are going out to him.  Then, not even an hour later, I clicked on one of my friends lists that I had created only to find out that someone I know has passed away.  He left this earth on Monday.  He had been very ill over the years.  I do not know exactly what he suffered from but I know it wasn't good.  I never had the pleasure of meeting him in person, we only had an online friendship.  That is something that will haunt me for the rest of my life.  We did chat a lot though online and he had the most amazing attitude.  He was always patient, listening to me and my "problems".  And he always was able to put a positive perspective on what was going on in my life, no matter what was going on in his.  That is something that can never be taken away.

That's what it's all about, people.  Taking the time for the people in your life that you care about.  I know that it's easier said than done many times, but it's oh so worth it.  I have spent most of my adult life living with so many "what ifs" when it comes to my loved ones.  People that I care deeply about and when they needed me, I was not there.  Mom and Grandmother are "what ifs" that I do not if I can ever forgive myself for.  There were times when that almost killed me.  Seriously.  I can work through it, but not sure if I can ever forgive and that is hard to live with sometimes.  And, honestly, I'm tired of the "what ifs".

I know my friends and family.  We all have a great many people in our lives that we care about.  Sadly, though, many of us are too busy with whatever.  Many times we hide behind things like Facebook so that we don't have to make the effort.  Yes, we're busy with work and life and whatever.  But, in the end, is that what really matters?  No.  It is the people we cherish.  That's what matters.  They are in our lives for a reason and there is no excuse for not maintaining in real time.  I am guilty of this for sure and it makes me so tired.  I'm tired of being tired.  Aren't you?

So, whoever actually reads this...take time tomorrow to connect.  Write someone a letter.  Call someone.  Return someone's call.  Go to lunch with a friend.  Spend some time together. Let someone know the difference they have made in your life.  Chances are, the feeling is mutual.

We've all heard, and probably said, that tomorrow is not a guarantee...or something to that effect.  As cliche' as that is, it is the God's honest truth.  Let's not let the ones we care about become a "what if".  Believe me, it's not worth that in the end.  We're here now, so we should make the most of the opportunities with the people in our lives.  Life is too short not to make the most of it.

Be good to yourself and to others. Be blessed.  I know I am because of you.

That is all.

Quote of the day

I suppose sooner or later in the life of everyone comes a moment of trial.  We all of us have our particular devil who rides us and torments us, and we must give battle in the end.

                                                                           Daphne du Maurier, Rebecca

Thought for the day

Here I am now, two weeks out of graduation.  I have been working on my resume and looking around at potential jobs here in Guilford and the surrounding counties.  Needless to say, it's all overwhelming at the moment.  First of all, I have never really had to do a resume before except one for the social work department when I was applying to get in and for my field placement.  I hated doing it because it just looked so simple....there just wasn't much to it.  I realize that working for the same company for 16 years does look good but it also only takes up a little space on one's resume.  Secondly, I have never really had to look for jobs before.  That is, real jobs that require experience and education.  I can honestly say that every job I have ever had came from one networking connection or another. This makes things a little daunting.  I will forge through because it is part of the process, but still it's very new territory to me.

So, today, I will work more on the resume and getting profiles set up to look for jobs.  I am determined, though, not to let my fears overtake me today.  It really does get pretty scary for me thinking about all of this.  Worrying that I'm not experience enough and no one will hire me.  Yes, I realize that we all have to start somewhere.  I'm fine with that.  I just want to find somewhere to start, that's all.  It's not like I'm sitting on a pile of money and can spend a year looking around for work.  Being an adult comes with responsibilities...and bills...too many bills.  And I also do better, mentally, when I have something to do, someplace to go where I feel like I am needed.  So, I will keep moving forward and seeing what today brings my way.  While I understand that this is a slow process, I must keep at it and perservere.  Otherwise, what was the point in getting the degree in the first place?

Wish me luck!

Cheers

Quote of the day

Love will cost you dearly.  And it will break your heart.  But in the end, it will save the world.

                                                                            Sarah Thebarge

Thought for the day

Some days, life with a dog can get frustrating.  Not that I would change having Squirt for anything in the world.  He's made our little family complete.  And I'm old enough and smart enough to realize that having a dog is the closest thing to having an actual child that I will ever get, so needless to say I am quite protective of my little one.

When you take a dog, or any other animal, into your life they become part of your family.  At least that's how I see it.  I know that not everyone feels that way and that's sad.  Animals bring so much to one's life.  And you do realize how your perspective changes particularly when it comes to your stuff.  Squirt pretty much owns the house now and 99% of the time gets whatever he wants.  Spoiled?  Yes!  Do I care? No!  He sits on whatever he wants, sleeps wherever he wants and yes, pees wherever he needs to when he can't hold it any longer.  Those are just the facts that have come to be expected.

And also, I realize that sometimes sacrifices must be made when it comes to Squirt.  Last year, when there was a chance his eye would have to be removed, I was ready to sell my car to pay for it.  I didn't even think twice about it because that's what you do for your children.  Anyway, my graduation trip is coming up in a few weeks.  It's actually our annual trip to mountains of Tennessee to go camping with friends.  I had thought about planning something else as a trip, but since this one was so close to graduation, I thought I might as well do this for graduation instead.

But, as per usual in life, there is a fly in the ointment.  All of our regular dog sitters have said no to taking care of Squirt while we're gone.  Of course it's their right to say no but it certainly does put a hitch in our plans.  And I'm not exactly sure what to do now.  Squirt's not much of a people person, so taking him with us is not the best option but still a possibility.  We'd just have to take turns staying with him in the tent.  There are worse things I suppose LOL  Putting him in a kennel is not an option strictly for financial reasons.  So, there's a chance I may have to stay behind to take care of the pooch.  That would suck, but sometimes life throws you a curveball.  I would hate to miss this trip as I really love it every year.  And let's face it, I need it and Michael needs it.  On the other hand, Squirt needs me and family comes first.

We still have a few days to figure something out so I will make no rash decisions.  It's a rainy day here and now if I can just get Squirt to at least go pee in the front yard that would be wonderful!  Wish me luck!

Cheers

An Old Family Photo - Billie gets married

This is one of my favorite pictures of my Great Aunt Billie, or Granny B as we called her.  This was her bridal portrait.  She married Quincy Belle Snipes of Wilmington, NC in 1928.  Somewhere, in all of my stuff, I have the tiara she is wearing and also her shoes, which you can't see.  A beautiful portrait of a beautiful lady!

Thought for the day

Well, graduation was over almost 2 weeks ago and now it's time to be an adult again.  Or at least try to be an adult again LOL  As the feelings of accomplishment start to die down, it's time to focus on the future.  Now, don't get me wrong.  I feel very accomplished and that won't ever be taken away from me, it's merely subsiding for awhile.  Now I have to work on things like finding a job, trying to keep up with bills while I work part time, getting myself out there and networking, etc.  It's all very daunting to some degree, but it will get done.  It will definitely take some time because I'm fairly new to exploring the job market.  And I have a feeling I will be getting another part time job in the mean time so that Michael does not have the complete burden of supporting me while I search for a social work position.

And it's also time to get healthy....or healthier.  I know that I need to quit smoking and exercise more and eat better.  No time like the present to start on that, especially when you're on a budget and counting every (and I mean every) penny that comes and goes.  I will save a lot of money if I just get my ass in gear and do what is best for myself.  It will definitely be a struggle, but I have overcome things before and I will conquer this too.

Sometimes, however, it is very overwhelming to think of all of the things that I need to get done.  I hate that because I need the motivation.  When I get overwhelmed, like a lot of people, I tend to shrink back and hide.  I have never been one to confront challenges too well, but when one is left with little choice otherwise, what can you do?  It's scary territory for me, but I'm willing to try.  If I don't try, I'll never know.  And, frankly, I have already had a life full of "what ifs" and do not want or need to add to that list anymore.

Anyway, that's my thought this morning.  Time to go write some Thank You notes.

Cheers!

Quote of the day

"Who does not thank for little will not thank for much."

                                                                           Estonian Proverb

Thought for the day - polishing the silver

Like any other red blooded American, when I want to relax, I take out my silver and my tub of silver polish and just go to town.  I mean, who doesn't right?  LOL  Oddly enough, I do enjoy polishing silver.  It's one of the things I often did with Grandmother and Mom and it always brings back fond memories for me.  I don't think of it as a chore, but more of as something I enjoy doing.

One reason is that I polish the silver in the kitchen at the sink.  This is one of the areas of our house that I feel relaxed at.  Once again, it is a trip down memory lane.  I think it is important that a house have a window over the kitchen sink.  There's just something about being able to look outside while you're working that makes it easier.  Our house growing up had one and I spent a lot of time doing dishes and such at the sink.  Come to think of it, Grandma Fornes, Aunt Billie, Aunt Sara all had windows above their kitchen sinks and I spent time at each of them gladly.

But, back to the silver.  If you haven't figured out, I love my stuff.  And the reason I love my stuff is because of its history, most of it family history.  As I am polishing each piece, I remember the story behind it...the sterling candlesticks Grandmother received as a wedding present in 1933...the silver cranberry sauce dish that was only brought out at Thanksgiving...the bride's basket I bought for as a present to myself...the castor set that came from a historic home in Monroe.  Each of these things I love because I know exactly where they came from.  We didn't use all of these things, but I am determined to because what's the point of having it really if I don't use it?  That's part of the fun of all of it, and these things were made not only to be pretty but to be used.

One day, these pieces will end up in someone else's home.  Hopefully, they will get passed along to someone who cares and will cherish them, whether or not they use them.  I just hope that one day someone has fond memories of the silver that came from Bob's house like the memories I have of those pieces now.  Only time will tell.

Cheers

Antique of the day - Grandmother Bivens' sugar bowl

I found this out in the garage a few months ago in one of the many boxes I have out there.  Yes, I'm working on getting that under control LOL  I had forgotten that I had this.  I inherited this from Mom, who inherited in from Great Grandmother Bivens.  We never used it, it just sat in the corner cupboard for years.  At one time, it did have a matching cream pitcher.  I remember when we got this when dividing up the estate.  All of the dishes were out on the dining room table and people took turns choosing items until everything was claimed.  This was one of the first items Mom chose.  I'm not sure why she picked it other than it was a beautiful piece.  Grandmother told me that this was her mother's good sugar bowl.  She only brought it out, along with the creamer, when company was over.  Otherwise, it stayed put away in a cabinet, much like it did in our home.  I think I'll have to put some sugar in it and set it on the table for the next Sunday dinner.

Cheers

recipe of the day - sweet potato hash

We have had this dish several times and always enjoyed it.  It's a nice, healthy way of getting some sweet potatoes into your menu.  Enjoy!

Sweet Potato Hash

4 cups diced peeled sweet poatoes
2 cups diced red potato
2 Tbsp vegetable oil
1 cup chopped green pepper
2/3 cup chopped green onion
3/4 tsp salt
1/2 tsp celery seed
1/2 tsp black pepper
1/8 tsp nutmeg
1/4 cup fat free chicken broth
1 Tbsp cider vinegar

Place potatoes in a saucepan and cover with water.  Bring to a boil.  Reduce heat and let simmer 5 minutes.  Drain.
Heat oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium heat. Add bell pepper and green onions, cooking 2 minutes, stirring frequently.  Add potatoes, salt, celery seed, pepper and nutmeg, cooking 4 minutes and stirring occasionally.  Stir in chicken broth and vinegar.  Toss gently until all liquid is absorbed.  Yields 6 servings.

Showtune of the day

I cannot remember if I have posted this song before or not.  This morning, I am too lazy to go back through my blog and check LOL  Anyway, this particular song has been on my mind today.  I just finished writing my final paper as an undergraduate.  This paper was a reflection on a peace circle process we did in Methods 2.  One of the things we discussed in the circle was about community and what it means to us.  There are many definitions of community but I focused on the one that was there that day....my peers.  We have developed a community, this Social Work Class of 2017.  I have varying degrees of friendships this community, but I cherish everyone and feel that I can call on any of them if I need help.  And we're a class of around 80 or so people, so that's a pretty big community.  Anyway, thank you again for the enlightenment and for making my life better.

Keeping a promise - the story of the blue glass

With my graduation from college, finally, just one week away, I am looking back on many of the experiences that I have had that have shaped my life.  So many people....family and friends...supported me in my craziness, at times literal craziness, to get me to where I am today and where I will be next week.  I cannot thank each of you enough for what you have done for me.  And even though I have done a lot of stupid things in my adulthood, I would not change any of those experiences because it has made me who I am today.  Ok, that's a lie.  I would be better with my money.  But, otherwise, I'm satisfied from all of the learning I have done in this thing we call life.

Anyway, today I'm going to talk about the blue glass.

Mom's best friend, Janet, was always very good to me.  Sometimes, undeservedly so.  Still, she was a constant in my life for a long time and I do miss her.  After Mom died, Janet was especially attentive to me.  It was a crucial time in my life and she knew that I felt lost..which I totally did.  We spent a lot of time together during that period and went on several wonderful trips.

Janet had a collection of blue glass that I loved.  One of her aunts had inherited the collection from a coworker when she worked at Carson Newman.  Janet kept the collection boxed up in a neighbor's basement.  Being the antiques enthusiast that I was (I still am, but not as gung ho as an adult because my house is full), I thought it simply tragic that this beautiful collection was stashed away somewhere not being admired.

Shortly before Mom died, Janet brought over half of the collection to me via my brother Bill and a truck.  I think it was shortly before Bill and Heidi got married.  I could be wrong, but that's what I remember.  Anyway, Janet gave these pieces to me under the stipulation that I graduate from college.  Sure, I thought...no problem.  Little did I know that life had other plans for me for the next few decades.

After Mom's death, I floundered in school and eventually decided to take some time off.  Dad seemed ok with it, whether or not he was that's what he presented to me.  But, Janet was not happy with my decision.  Her fear was that I would not finish my education.  Statistically, she had a point as many people who drop out of college never return.  Still, it was what I needed to do at the time and I don't regret my choice.

Life for me has had many ups and downs and now I have found myself back in college, preparing to graduate.  While I'm very excited and proud of this, I am very reflective right now...which I don't mind at all.  Janet died several years ago.  We had lost touch and were not as close as we once were.  I take total blame for that...but that's an entirely different blog I will write one day.  However, in her will, Janet left me the remainder of the blue glass collection.  I was grateful to be remembered by her, but I also knew what she was telling me from beyond the grave:  go back to school.  I always had in the back of my mind Janet's stipulation for giving me the blue glass.  Over the years, I have sold many pieces...given many pieces away, etc.  But, I do cherish each piece wherever it is in the world today because it has been one of my motivators.

So, I thank Janet for what she did for me.  I feel that I have earned the blue glass finally and I am proud of that.  It may have taken me 42 years, but whatever.  I'm not always the best at keeping promises because I get easily sidetracked.  But this one I kept, even if it took me awhile.

Cheers