The Continuing Adventures of Just a Waiter

 There are times when I feel very sorry for the families of some of our residents.  The majority of our residents have families that are still very involved in their parents lives.  I realize how much of a blessing that is. Many elderly people do not have that.  Occasionally, we will have a resident who is essentially dropped off at Heritage Greens and that's the last time we see the family.  It does not happen a lot, but it has happened before.  And that's sad, but I digress.

I have talked about this before but many of our residents do not need to be in independent living.  They simply are not capable of living on their own, even under the roof of a senior living community.  Many times it is a case of dementia but sometimes the resident is too far gone physically to live by his or herself.  They just need more care.  And, yes, they can have in home health care.  Sometimes that works sometimes it does not.  It can be a very touch and go situation.

I watch so many children work so hard to maintain the normalcy in their parents lives that they are wearing themselves out emotionally and physically. I understand it.  You do not want to watch your parents deteriorate in any fashion.  The sad fact of life is that is going to happen and there is very little to be done to stop it.  You may be able to slow down the progression some, but aging cannot be stopped as long as someone is breathing.

I always try to be as positive and hopeful with residents families.  I don't want to overstep my bounds and offer my opinion unsolicited.  Yes, they need more help.  They would do better in a different kind of facility.  I know that's not what you want to hear, but that is the truth.  But I cannot say that.  I'm a secretary.  It's not my place.  I will, though, answer questions honestly if asked. I know that my opinion is taken to heart by family members and I will always present my argument in a way that's not the end of the world.  

It's just hard sometimes watching families putting themselves through so much stress.  This morning I started my shift at 7 a.m. and after a few minutes of being on the clock, one of our resident's daughters stopped by the front desk on her way out.  She'd been there all night with her mom because she needed more care.  She, the daughter, was smiling but I knew she was so tired.  I hear it in her voice whenever we speak on the phone.  It's rough on these people.  I cannot imagine.

I will continue to be as upbeat and positive and helpful to my residents and their families as I possibly can.  It's what I do.  It's just exhausting for all of us some days.

That is all.