Going through boxes from the garage

 

This month my daily challenge is to go through one box each day that is out in my garage.  So far, I have managed to go through several boxes.  This challenge has several purposes.  The big one is that my garage is a mess.  It's got my stuff, Jason and Marc's stuff and Michael's stuff all in it.  It just needs to be better organized and going through these boxes will help with that.  I can get rid of things.  And, yes, I do that from time to time.  But I can also condense the boxes.  That will help to save some space.

I enjoy going through the boxes and seeing what is in them.  Sometimes I refer to it on Facebook as I'm shopping in my garage.  And, in a sense, I am.  I find things that I either completely forgot I had, or I had forgotten exactly where I put them.  Last week, I found my castor set. It is something that I cherish, and I am glad to have it back out and on display. I also hope that this process will help me to start an online antiques selling venture. We shall see.  Either way, that is my challenge for this month.  Look for updates here or on Facebook.   You may see something that interests you!  LOL

Thoughts and prayers

 

I hate the fact that politics (in general and not one specific party) have stigmatized and ruined the use of "thoughts and prayers." For many of them it is used as a scapegoat when something happens.  This is especially true when it comes to gun violence in our society.  Instead of dealing with the issue itself, they hide behind thoughts and prayers. I believe that they think that will be enough to satiate their constituents and leave it at that.  And, in many cases, that is the truth.  But not for me.  

I will still say to someone "you're in my thoughts and prayers."  You know why?  Because that person IS in my thoughts and prayers.  It is what I can do immediately in that moment when I learn of some tragedy.  I am thinking about you and saying a prayer for you.  Whether or not the other person appreciates it is up to them. But it is what I can do in that specific moment of time.  It is not the only thing I will do. It is simply the beginning of a process for me.  And, honestly, thoughts and prayers are as much about how I feel as it is the other person.  It is a way for me to cope with sadness.  It works for me.  I understand that it doesn't work for everyone but I'm not everyone.  

And I agree that in certain circumstances thoughts and prayers are NOT enough.  We know what these issues are, and we know that they need to be fixed. There is a lot that is broken in our country and thoughts and prayers should not be hidden behind in order to avoid addressing an issue.  That infuriates me but I must make my own path. 

So, just know that if something horrific happens to you, the chances are quite good that I am going to respond by having you in my thoughts and prayers.  You can accept it or not.  That is up to you.  But do not tell me that my feelings are useless.  I'm not hiding behind them.  They are my first step in processing and figuring out how to move forward with the situation. It leads to a lot more in my life and I am not ashamed of that.  Just wanted you to know.  That is all. 

10 Best Picture Oscar Winners that I have not seen

 There is a site I enjoy going to several times a week called listchallenges.com. It's exactly that.  They have different lists, and you check off how many apply to you.  Mostly I do the movie lists.  One of the ones I did recently was about how many of the winners of the Best Picture Oscar have you seen?  I had not seen as many as I thought I had.  I don't watch as many movies as I used to either.  Oh well.  Still, here are 10 Best Picture Winners that I have not seen but really want to. Descriptions courtesy of IMDB.com. 

1. You Can't Take It With You - 1938

The son of a snobbish Wall Street banker becomes engaged to a woman from a good-natured but decidedly eccentric family not realizing that his father is trying to force her family from their home for a real estate development.

2. Spotlight - 2015

The true story of how the Boston Globe uncovered the massive scandal of child molestation and cover-up within the local Catholic Archdiocese, shaking the entire Catholic Church to its core.

3. Gentleman's Agreement - 1947

A reporter pretends to be Jewish in order to cover a story on anti-Semitism, and personally discovers the true depths of bigotry and hatred.

4. The King's Speech - 2010

The story of King George VI, his unexpected ascension to the throne of the British Empire in 1936, and the speech therapist who helped the unsure monarch overcome his stammer.

5. Mrs. Miniver - 1942

A British family struggles to survive the first months of World War II.

6. The Silence of the Lambs - 1991

A young F.B.I. cadet must receive the help of an incarcerated and manipulative cannibal killer to help catch another serial killer, a madman who skins his victims.

7. Marty - 1955

A middle-aged butcher and a school teacher who have given up on the idea of love meet at a dance and fall for each other

8. The Last Emperor - 1987

Bernardo Bertolucci's Oscar-winning dramatization of China's eleventh and final monarch of the Qing dynasty: Emperor Puyi.

9. The Godfather - 1972

The aging patriarch of an organized crime dynasty transfers control of his clandestine empire to his reluctant son

10. The Sting - 1973

Two grifters team up to pull off the ultimate con.

How many have you seen?  Any recommendations on some of your favorite Best Picture Oscar winners?  I'd love to know!

Show Tunes

 

The other night, I posted on Facebook about watching musical theatre clips on YouTube and how I wish I had someone to share that with.  It's true.  But not necessarily the way you think.  I was not referring to a boyfriend or a partner or a date, even though I would not turn that down.  I just meant having those theatre friends who get excited to just sit and listen to show tunes.  Ah, those were the days.  Bonding with people over a cast recording is pretty damn cool to me.  In high school, all of us drama club kids new the scores to Phantom and Les Miz and we could just talk about those for hours.

When I got to college, the first time, I encountered many other musical theatre enthusiasts.  Marcia and I would spend hours listening to music and watching musicals.  We were not in a musical theatre program, so we had to make our own fun.  If I had a dollar for every show choir concert I sat through, I would at least be able to buy myself dinner LOL It started to become easy to spot the people who loved show tunes.  Sometimes it's because they had the t-shirt on.  Sometimes a random lyric would come out and you instantly recognized it.  Hell, we even had parties where we sat around listening to cast albums.  

It's just a part of my life that I have let fall behind and I need to bring it up to speed.  I know very few of the shows from the last 15 years of Broadway seasons.  It is almost impossible now to go to the music store for the latest cast album.  I have picked up some good ones at the used bookstore, though.  But I need more of that in my life.  It makes me happy.  And I want to find people to share that joy with.  That is all. 

Today's Moment of Mindfulness

 

Strong emotions, such as anger, hurt or fear, can erupt very quickly.  In the split second before this happens, allow yourself to pause before you react.  Become mindful of your breath and notice the sensations in your body.  You then have a choice about what you do next. 

50 at 50 - My list is complete

 

My 50 at 50 list is now complete. By that I mean that I have added three more things to come up with a list of 50 things to do.  Now I just have two months left to get it all done LOL  Now, I know that is NOT going to happen but as I have stated earlier, I will carry this list into my 51st year and keep on going. And I have also completed another item on my list which is have a job interview.  That is something that I have not done in over 8 years so I wanted to do that at least once this year.  It was a great experience, whether or not I get the job, so I am definitely glad that I did it.  And I can check that one off of the list. 

So far, I have completed 12 things on my list, so almost a quarter of it has been done.  I think that is pretty good.  Still have a little ways to go but I can get more things done before December 5th.  I need to really look the list over and start scheduling my time and my weekends to get some of the things checked off. It gives me something to look forward to and we all need that!  But now that I have come up with 50 things, I feel a sense of accomplishment.  I have talked about this before, but I do better when I have a list of things in front of me.  I get more things done that way and it might as well be a list of fun things to do instead of my usual list of household chores LOL. It's a good thing!

Thought of the Day

 "What if" is a phrase that has been a big part of my adult life that has invaded my mind on an almost daily basis.  We all have those thoughts.  "If I had only...." or "I should have...". And those thoughts can be very taxing on one's spirit.  I know that they are taxing on my spirit. Well, they used to be.  I work very hard at not getting myself caught up in things that might have been had I done this or behaved that way.  While that does take a great deal of effort, I have learned that by not allowing those feelings to infiltrate my life I feel better. While I know that I cannot change the things that I have done in the past which I am not proud of, I can acknowledge them and move on.  After all, those things made me the person that I am today.  And I am proud of who I am today.

For me personally, I feel that I came to this resolution late in life but in all honesty there really is not a defined timeline for such things.  And now that I am to this point, I can move forward in positive ways.  Now when one of those thoughts creep into my conscience, I recognize it and use it for something positive in my life. When I think "well, I should have done this", I will then take that thought and repurpose it into something like "well, because I didn't do that then, now I'm doing this which is what I want to do now." It may be hard to understand what I am trying to say but it all makes sense in my head. 

"What ifs" are a natural part of our mental health.  I am simply taking mine and making something good out of them. That is all. 

Quote of the Week

 This was a good quote to carry with me today.  And will be a good quote to carry with me everyday!

Getting myself into the gerontology job market

 Today, I am going to experience something that I have not done in a long time as an adult.  I am going to a job interview.  I have not had a job interview in 8 years.  I am pretty nervous because I do not want to make a fool of myself.  Most of the jobs I have interviewed for have been not very important in the grand scheme of things.  I do not mean that the jobs were not important to me or what I was doing was not important, but these were jobs I did not need experience for or a degree for.  I have loved the jobs that I have had in my life.  They have helped shape me into who I am today.  But now, after graduation, I feel like I am in a different league of job searching.  And I am.

I debated a long time about applying for gerontology jobs that I am not qualified for.  I decided that I would go ahead and start applying for them for two reasons.  One is my goal of networking.  Even if I do not get the job that I am applying for, at least I will be getting myself out there and that is important in this line of work. Gerontology is as much about who you know as what you know.  Another reason is that I never know when someone will be willing to take a chance on someone like me, newly graduated with little experience in the field.  It may be the case today. It may not.  But I will have done it.  I put my application in online on a Sunday and I was called to set up an interview the next day.  We shall see how it goes.  Either way, I am happy to have this opportunity.  

Student Adventures - my online notes

 In a follow up to my last blog about school, I realized that I also need to store my notes from online while I still have access to them.  First and foremost, I need to find out how long I will have access to my student accounts. That will at least give me a time frame from which I can go about saving everything.  I started looking back at all of the documents that I have saved and it is quite a few.  Three years' worth.  But they are all going to be beneficial to me in the long run, so I need to hold on to them. I need to get a flash drive to put them all on so that I can have easy access to them.  I will add that to my list!  I wonder if I should also print everything out as well.  Hmmmmm Decisions, decisions.  I am hoping that by reviewing all of this material that it will motivate me to learn more.  I need to keep learning so that I stay current and can be more "marketable" in the gerontology world.  We shall see.  But, first, let me find out my access dates and go from there. 

Here's That Rainy Day - Susie Arioli

 I first heard Susie Arioli on NPR.  I don't remember which show I was listening to, but I do remember her.  Her voice is so soothing and clear.  I love her vocals.  I have found several of her albums over the years and so enjoy listening to them.  If you have not heard her before, I suggest you listen to her.  I hope you enjoy!

Recipe of the Week - Ham and Potato Soup

 Now that we are coming to the end of summer and fall will be here soon, it is time for me to start thinking about soups.  I do not really make soup that much during the summer months but when fall gets here, there is just nothing like a good bowl of soup for dinner!  Or lunch.  I found this recipe online a while back.  I was looking for something to do with some extra ham that I had left over, and this was the perfect solution.  While I have only made it once, I will definitely make it again.  Anytime I can use my crock pot is a good thing!

Ham and Potato Soup

1 bag frozen hashbrowns, thawed

2 cups diced ham

1/2 cup chopped onion

2 celery stalks, chopped

4 cups chicken broth

1/4 tsp salt

1/4 tsp pepper

1/4 tsp garlic powder

8 oz cream cheese, softened

2 cups shredded cheddar

Garnish - Green onion

Mix all of the ingredients except for cream cheese and cheddar in your crock pot. Cook on low for 4 hours. Add cheeses then and stir until smooth. Cook 30 more minutes, stirring several times. Top with green onion and serve. 

Enjoy!

10 of My Favorite Podcasts

 I guess you can say that I came to enjoy Podcasts later than most people.  I really only began listening to them during the past few years.  But I really do enjoy them and find myself listening to them on a weekly basis.  I don't binge listen to them, so for many of the ones that I enjoy I am still playing catch up.  Ah, well. I tend to seek out things that I love when I am looking for podcasts.  Here are 10 podcasts that I love to listen to.  What are some of yours?  I am always open to recommendations!

1. The Plot Thickens - Turner Classic Movies series that each season focuses on one piece of Hollywood History.  The latest season is about the epic flop Cleopatra starring Elizabeth Taylor.  

2. Can't Wait for Christmas - Keeping the spirit of Christmas alive all year round, hosted by comedian Tim Babb (with help from his family).

3. Sporkful - Hosted by 3-time James Beard award winner Dan Pashman, it's not about foodies, it's about eaters. 

4. Merry Britmas - a series about the holidays in Britain.  It covers music, specials, traditions in a very fun way!

5. You Must Remember This - Another deep dive into the world of Hollywood.  There are many fun seasons to listen to. Mine is currently Six Degrees of Joan Crawford.

6. And the Award Goes To - Each episode features a Tony Award winner and their experience winning the award. 

7. Golden Girls Deep Dive - They take each episode and examine it.  Can be quite fun but sometimes they do get hung up on something that should just let go of LOL 

8. Totally Rad Christmas - Everything 80s Christmas podcast.  Very nostalgic! 

9. Season's Eatings - Each episode looks into a Christmas food such as plum pudding.  Often there are dishes from African or European cultures that I was unaware of.  Very enjoyable! 

10. Gastropod - More fun with food! 

Musicals that won the Tony Award for Best Musical that I have not seen.

 I do not keep up with musicals the way that I used to.  I need to pick up the pace on that again because I have always loved them and they have been an important part of my life.  And I have loved watching the Tony Awards every year since I can remember.  Looking back at the musicals that snagged the top prize, here are the ones that I have never seen a stage production of.  I'm going in order from when the Tony Awards first started. And I am not counting if I have only seen the film version because many of these have film versions which I have seen and enjoyed, but not the stage version.

1. Wonderful Town - 1953

2. Kismet - 1954

3. My Fair Lady - 1957

4. Redhead - 1959

5. Fiorello - 1960

6. A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum - 1963

7. Man of La Mancha - 1966

8. Hallelujah, Baby! - 1968

9. 1776 - 1969

10. Two Gentlemen of Verona - 1972

11. Raisin - 1974

12. Ain't Misbehavin' - 1978

13. Nine - 1982

14. Big River - 1985

15. The Mystery of Edwin Drood - 1986

16. Jerome Robbins' Broadway - 1989

17. The Lion King - 1998

18. Contact - 2000

19. The Producers - 2001

20. Avenue Q - 2004

21. Jersey Boys - 2006

22. Billy Elliot - 2009

23. Memphis - 2010

24. The Book of Mormon - 2011

25. Once - 2012

26. A Gentleman's Guide to Love & Murder - 2014

27. Fun Home - 2015

28. Hamilton - 2016

29. Dear Evan Hansen - 2017

30. The Band's Visit - 2018

31. Hadestown - 2019

32. Moulin Rouge - 2020

33. A Strange Loop - 2022

34. Kimberly Akimbo - 2023

35. The Outsiders - 2024

36. Maybe Happy Ending - 2025

When I started this list, I did not realize there would be that many.  Some of these I have not heard the recordings of either and I must work on that as well!  Have you seen any of these?  Any recommendations?

Ain't It Good - Children of Eden, Elon University 2010

 I recently listened to the original cast recording of Children of Eden and was reminded what a power show this is.  If you don't know it, the first act tells the story of Adam and Eve and the second act tells the story of Noah and the Ark.  In the song, Ain't It Good, Noah's wife rejoices at the sight of the earth after the storm is over.  I did not see Elon's production, but this clip is as excellent as anything I have seen there. A good way to start my Friday. 

His Eye is On the Sparrow

 I remember going to see Sister Act 2 in the theater when it first was released. This performance of His Eye is On the Sparrow I found to be deeply moving.  This is one of those songs that had heard sporadically throughout my life, but it was not really one I grew up hearing much.  And it's so beautiful but the music and the lyrics.  A great moment of music in a movie. 

Three slots left

 

While I know that I will not finish up my list before I turn 51, I still have to come up with three more things to make this at least a true 50 at 50 list.  I really did not foresee this being as difficult to come up with when I really began composing the list.  When I started the list, I made the decision to add things that are realistic and not things that I definitely know would not happen this year. So, I did not put things like travel abroad on my list.  But I did put steps to traveling abroad on there like getting my passport and my real id done.  I compromised with some dreams, so to speak.  

So now I have three slots left to fill and no clue what I can put in there.  I've covered cooking, reading, travel, skills, events.  Not sure what is left.  I can probably find a few things within those groups to add specifically but my mind is blank.  So I am definitely open to suggestion at this point. If you have any ideas, please pass them along.  I really hope that the next time I write about my list, I will have accomplished at least one more thing on it. No pressure though!

The first day of school

 Today was the first day of school for many kids in Guilford County and it has brought back so many memories for me.  I have loved seeing all of the pictures from my friends of their kids in their first day outfits, often with signs that say "First day of..." Those are memories that these kids will carry with them for the rest of their lives (one of the good things about social media). 

I started first grade in 1981.  This was back before schools (at least in the school system I was a part of) did open houses before school started.  I remember Mom taking me to Walter Bickett Elementary that day.  The kindergarten and first grade classes shared a building.  So we had to go into the hallway and look for our names outside of each classroom to see where we belonged.  I was in Sue Richmond's class.  What I wouldn't give to talk to her again.  She was one of my favorite teachers.  Outside of her classroom, she put a tree on the wall with apples, and each apple had the name of one of her students on it. That is how I found out which class I was in.  

I remember the first day of 4th grade.  I had Mrs. Thaxton that year.  It was important because that would be the first grade that we would change classes in, for reading and math.  Then 5th grade was interesting because all three elementary schools combined that year.  Walter Bickett had all of the city's 4th and 5th grade students and the K through 3rd were divided between the other two.  So, there were so many new people to meet that year.  And starting new schools was a frightening adventure as well.  The first days of Monroe Middle and Monroe High Schools were both very intimidating for me.  But I survived each time. I would not necessarily want to go through those times again, but I do enjoy the nostalgic memories of them.

Of course, I cannot forget shopping for stuff before the first day of class.  Buying new clothes for school was exciting.  Mom would take us to T.J. Maxx in Charlotte to shop for clothes.  I always thought it was a big deal to go out of town to shop and in many ways, it was.  Bless Mom for making us try on each and everything to make sure if fit and that there was room to grow.  It would take several hours but she was patient, and I always found it fun.  Buying the school supplies....pencils, crayons, paper, the memorable Trapper Keeper, fun folders to keep things in, the backpack.  There was just something about the newness of it all each year that gave me something to look forward to.

While I did have some hard emotional times throughout my school years, I chose to remember the things that make me happy.  And it all really started with that first day of school in 1981.  

Gift Cards

 

Sometimes when I am going through this process, I find things that I forgot that I had which can be beneficial to me.  Not often, but it does happen.  Yesterday was one of those days.  I have this wooden box that I use to keep loose change in.  It belonged to Grandmother.  And like her, I keep it on a shelf in my bedroom.  When I was cleaning the shelf, I went ahead and opened up the box because I had not done that in a while. It's not like I need to look at the loose change that is in there, but you never know. Anyway, I found an entire stack of unused gift cards.  I had totally forgotten that they were in there.  Jackpot!!

I took out the cards and decided to sort them.  There were probably 50 or so in there.  By the way, I often get gift cards at work which is where many of these came from.  They don't have super value but better than nothing.  I have a ton of $5 Chick-Fil-A cards that were given out at work.  I do not eat there, but I suppose it is good to have them in case of emergency.  Anyway, I decided to get them all sorted to see what loot I had.  I divided them into three categories:  places to eat, places to shop, and generic (Visa, etc.).  It looks like I have many options to eat out in the future now if I want to.  

I do not know why I have not used these cards and have let them accumulate like I have.  It may be that in the back of my mind I have not used them so that I could save them for emergency situations.  I do not know.  But it is nice to have found them and now have them organized. I probably need to go ahead and begin using them.  I did not find an expiration date on any of them, but you never know.  I would hate to let them go to waste.  Anyway, it was a pleasant surprise that may not have happened for some time if I was not constantly cleaning up my spaces.  One drawer at a time is paying off, so to speak!

Caring for the inside and outside of the house

 I was talking with Lois yesterday about how hard it is sometimes when you live by yourself in a house to get everything done.  And I meant both inside and outside the house.  Now, I do not live alone right now.  I have a roommate.  A great roommate.  But he's only here four nights each week and his work schedule does not really allow him time to get household chores done too much.  Don't get me wrong, he does still do things, and I am so appreciative of the help. But it is outside where I am having to play catch up. 

The conversation began because I was talking about getting out in the front yard on Saturday to rake up grass that was left from the last mowing.  I now have someone coming by every few weeks to mow.  Not because I do not want to do it, but it is more of a time constraint thing.  And, honestly, with all of the rain we had over the last six weeks it has been hard to find the time to cut the yard.  It is too wet to mow before work and often the rain happens mid to late afternoon, which also keeps me from doing it.  

I don't mind paying for someone to mow.  When we first moved in, Michael and I paid our neighbor's kid to mow each week and that was fine with us.  We started mowing once he left for college.  Of course, Michael really took care of that, and I did the inside stuff which suited me fine. It is not like I hate working outside, it is simply not what comes to me naturally. I definitely want to start getting outside more and make my yard one that I can be proud of.  It is simply a matter of balancing my time with that.  I think coming up with some daily things for my to-do list will be helpful with that.  

One day, I hope to have an actual home of my own and with that will come a yard.  And if I want to keep up with things and have everything looking presentable, I just need to make the time and not fall behind.  Easier said than done, right?  We'll see how that goes.  If you stop by the house in a few months and I am lost in the brush outside, it'll be a sign that it's not going well.  Let's hope that doesn't happen!

Finding some new antiques shops

 I want to find some new places to go antiques shopping.  Not that I need anything.  We all know that is not true LOL But I just love going into new places and seeing how things are displayed and set up in the different booths and shops.  And I never know what I will find.  Much to the dismay of my already full house, I almost always walk out with something in my hand.  Not always, but mostly.  And I have this pattern (again with the patterns) that I do in each shop.  I have to make a full run of the entire shop before I put anything in my basket.  Unless it is something I completely fall in love with and have to have right then and there.  Thankfully, that almost never happens. 

There is an antiques mall in Asheboro that I have not been to yet.  I would love to find someone to go with and walk around there.  I would also love to go back to Waxhaw, NC, and see if any of the shops are still there. I have the feeling that the small town looks somewhat different from when I was there 35 years ago. And I have a friend in Rocky Mount that has a great store called Trash 2 Treasures that I really want to take a day and make a trip up there.  He and his mom have wonderful things in their store. That would definitely be fun for me but very dangerous.  And I think that there is an antiques mall up 220 north near Summerfield.  A former coworker told me about that one.  Got to love the local places. 

And while I do not need anything, I am always on the lookout for something it seems.  Sometimes, I am simply looking ahead to Christmas.  I love to give vintage things for Christmas!  But I love fun vintage kitchen items.  I love serving pieces.  I have an infinity for compotes and covered dishes it appears.  I am totally ok with that.  I also still have my antiques bucket list. I have checked 4 out of 10 things off of that list so that leaves me searching for 6 items.  One is very specific:  the ceramic bumble bee honey pot. Aunt Sara had one in her kitchen, and I am not sure who ended up with that, but it was always fun.  The rest leave room for interpretation.  But the beauty about those is that I must fall in love with them.  I am not going to buy a Gone with the Wind lamp just because it is one. I have to absolutely love it.  Now, I know that I could find something suitable on Ebay, but I would rather go to a brick-and-mortar store.  

So, one of these weekends I am going to get myself out of the house and find some new antiques places to shop.  I love it and it makes me happy.  So, why not?

Class notes

 Now that classes are done and my time in the master's program as a student has come to an end, I am wondering the best way to organize all of my class notes.  I have an entire box of them.  They are not all in order of the class I took them in, but they are somewhat already organized. When I was working on my capstone presentation, my entire den was covered in different piles of notes from all of my classes.  I am sad to say that once I was done, I just stuffed them all into a box without thinking ahead.  I will excuse myself of that because to be honest, I was pretty stressed out and tired of looking at them LOL

When I updated my resume this week, I added some of the classes that I took in school, and I realized that I need to be able to access those notes for later purposes. It's not as if I cannot talk about these subjects without the notes, but they do come in handy.  And when I was doing my capstone, I would often come across something that I had totally forgotten about that was so useful.  Also, going back and reviewing my notes from class may spark an interest in an area that I had not thought about steering my gerontology career.  You just never know.

So, it is time to start going through my box of notes.  I will reread them and get them better organized.  I think I will keep a highlighter and a pen and pad close by to make better notes on the ones I already have.  Maybe I will get some notebooks to put them in.  One day, they'll be someone else's trash but for the time being, having my notes organized is going to be so beneficial to me. 

Patterns

 I don't know if I was like this as a child but as an adult, almost everything I do is based on a pattern of some kind. When I organize things in the house, like CDS, DVDS, records, books, etc., they are all in alphabetical order.  That is not that unique, but it drives me crazy when things get out of order.  I take my time when I listen to a new record or read a new book to put it where it needs to be in the sequence of things.  This also helps me when I do inventory.  It is a lot easier to find things when they are listed alphabetically.

I also use numbers in my everyday existence. Every single day.  And while this system may seem completely foreign to some people, it is completely natural to me.  Here is an example of what I mean.  Let us say that today is the 4th of the month.  When I make my coffee, I will select the 4th coffee up in the shelf to drink out of.  When I'm getting dressed for work, I will select the 4th pair of pants in line and the 4th shirt to go with it.  Now, this does not always work out due to fashion rules so sometimes I bend that one LOL When I drive home from work there are 15 different ways I come.  I have three choices of roads in my first section and five choices of roads in my second section.  Being the 4th, with only three choices in the first section the list begins over.  It makes complete sense to me.  And it keeps things different and there's a definite way I make the choices of things to do. 

When I get home, I have a list of things to I want to accomplish each day.  This day, I will start with the 4th thing on the list.  If I listen to a CD or record, yes it will be the 4th.  I even choose my blog topics based on this pattern.  I don't know if there is a term for this kind of pattern loving, but it does something to ground me.  I am in control without being in control.  But whatever it is, it works for me.  That is all I know.  Now, I need to go look at my "to-do" list and see what I am going to do next.  It all depends on what day it is LOL

Keeping my list going

 

I have come to accept that my 50 at 50 list is not going to completed by the time I turn 51.  And you know what?  That is perfectly ok.  I am not at all disappointed, in fact I am quite the opposite. There are still over 3 months left until I turn 51. If I win the lottery, there's a chance I could complete my list but realistically, that is not going to happen LOL So I want to keep my list going after my next birthday.  It is nice to have things written down that I want to do and accomplish. 

I look back at the things that I have done this year and I'm pretty pleased with it. I have gotten out more.  I have tried new things and eaten at new places.  Because of this list, I've seen plays this year.  I have gone to museums this year. And these things have happened because of my list.  If I didn't have my list, I may have done some of these things but most likely I would not have. So that is all the more reason why I want to keep my list going.  It gives me some direction for my free time. 

I have a long weekend this weekend.  While I am going to spend today catching up on my household lists, I am hoping to knock a few things off of my 50 at 50 list. We shall see.  It gives me something to look forward to.  That is all. 

Dealing with hate

 

One of the things that I struggle with in my spirit these days, and I know I am not the only one, is dealing with feelings of hatred towards others.  I do not like to hate.  It is not in my nature, and I definitely was not brought up that way.  But I would be lying if I said that those feelings are not there.  They continue to rear their ugly heads all the while I am trying my best to push them back down.  It is a difficult thing to do. And it is a difficult thing to control sometimes.

Often times when I am feeling that way, I try to remind myself that it is perfectly fine not to like something or like someone but try very hard not to let it get to the level of hate.  And it is not because my feelings are not legitimate, at least to me, but it is more due to the effect that hatred has on my person.  It tears into me and eats away at my spirit.  I do not like that. And I am trying to find ways to work through those feelings and come out better on the other side.

Whenever I talk about my spirituality, I am not always meaning religion. I do spend a lot of time talking with God.  Not everyone does and I am not the kind of person to shove my beliefs down anyone's throat. I do take a lot of comfort in those conversations, though.  I also find myself talking to the earth.  Just putting ideas and thoughts out there for the earth to hear and see how it responds.  Sometimes the response is quite obvious and sometimes it is not.  Either way, it helps to ground me and my feelings, and I am able to process things in a better way. 

There is an awful lot of hatred in our world today.  Everywhere I turn I see it in some form, and I am trying my best not to let it get to me.  Sometimes I am successful but sometimes I am not. I am open to suggestions on how any of you deal with those feelings.  I will say that overall, I am much better than I used to be in dealing with it.  I know it will never go away, but in the meantime, I am going to do my best to lessen it in my life.