Bleh. I have been in a funk all week. I'm not really sure why, but there you have it. I just feel completely unmotivated right now. I don't know if I'm scared of what the future holds or doesn't hold for me. I just don't know. I do know that I'm worried that something will happen before graduation that could totally screw things up. This is a normal feeling for people getting ready to graduate I think, but it totally sucks.
This will pass, I'm just ready for it to pass sooner than later. I have to find some things that will get me out of these feelings and I just do not know what they are yet. I know some things like getting projects done at the house. As strange as that may sound, I just exist better when the house is in order and I am so far behind on that. But it's hard sometimes doing things when I'm home alone. I get sucked into the computer or Netflix or what have you and then get nothing done. Then, I feel guilty for not having done anything. It's a vicious cycle.
I also have one class that is kicking my butt, in a good way though. Grant writing. The professor is tough because he knows what he's talking about. It's good because we'll be coming away with a valuable skill. It's also a lot of work and sometimes I just can't seem to get focused. I will get the work done, it's just a matter of making myself focus and doing it. When graduation is only a few weeks away, it can be hard to focus. But I know that I have to.
Oh well...onward and upward...eventually. Let's see if motivation and focus will be my friends today.
That is all
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