Continuing adventures of just a waiter - patience

By definition, patience is the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble or suffering without getting upset or angry.

Patience is something you must have when working with the elderly.  During one's golden years, everything seems to slow down and move at a more moderate pace....the body, the mind, the whole package.  You cannot rush these people and that's ok.  They have lived this long and they deserve to be able to take their time.  Now, I say they don't move fast but there are some times that's not true...when the dining room doors open, it's like watching the horses at the Kentucky Derby come out of the gate!

Patience can take a lot out of a person, though, and you have to try really hard sometimes.  That's just how it goes.  Sometimes communicating can be difficult, but you have to do your best and take your time.  We have several residents that communicate differently and it can be very challenging understanding them or getting them to understand.  One of our residents has aphasia, the loss of ability to understand or express speech brought on by brain damage.  The fact is, she can understand and express herself, you just have to be patient.  You can't interrupt her or try to finish her sentences for her and you must speak slower than normal.  Aphasia can cause her emotions to flip like a light switch and she gets frustrated.  It's hard not letting that affect you, but you have to try your hardest to do that for her.

Another resident is deaf and has recently suffered several strokes.  Before her strokes, she could communicate very well and understand.  Now, not as much and, like a child, it can be difficult to get her to understand why she can't do things like she used to.  And then there are the residents with the beginning stages of dementia that we interact with on a daily basis.  Sometimes they go round in circles, working themselves into a frenzy of frustration.  They know what they want to say, they just cannot get the words out of their mouths.  You have to try your best to guide their thoughts and words.  It can be very straining, but it is so worth it when they are finally able to get out what they want to.

And then there is simply the daily interactions with the residents.  As they are elderly, they take more time with everything.  They've earned that right and they've earned our treating them with respect for that.  If you just take the time to listen to them, make them know that they have been heard, it makes a world of difference.  The reason it is so important to be patient is that it gives them dignity.  They are an important part of our world and they work very hard to be dignified in their old age.  We must do whatever we can to ensure they feel that way.  Patience is key.  And our patience not only gives them the dignity that they deserve, it gives us dignity in return.

That is all