Dear North Carolina

Dear North Carolina,

     Today, my initial urge was to tell you to go f**k yourself.  I have lived in this state my entire life.  Both sides of my family have resided in this state for generations.  And, up until recently, I have been proud to call North Carolina my home.  I am very angry at you and with those feelings came the need to lash out at you with a vengeance. However, I knew that going that route would do me no good.  It may make me feel temporarily better, but it would not be constructive. I stepped back and looked at the entirety of my North Carolina experience.  I recalled my upbringing.  I was raised to have good manners.  And good manners not only includes being polite, but also making others comfortable and at ease.  In other words, good manners is one of the very core values of being Southern.  You, North Carolina, have lost your manners.  And what's more important is that you do not care.
     If you think that this legislation, which will eventually be overturned, is going to keep us down or make us disappear, then you truly have another thing coming.  Your simple act of hatred will not bring about the permanent outcomes you desire.  Look around you.  We are everywhere.  The teacher that educates your child.  The chef who cooks your food.  The EMT who gives you CPR.  The social worker who advocates for your basic human rights which you take for granted.  We cut your hair.  We design most of the clothes you wear.  That piece of your mother's hard to find china you broke and had to replace you bought from one of the largest independent companies in the south, which is gay owned.  We sell your houses.  We defend you in court.  We are everywhere.  And we are going to stay that way whether you like it or not.
     Now, I totally understand that change is hard.  It takes some adjustment from everyone.  But, if we do not strive towards change for the betterment of all humanity, what is the point of our existence?  I know there are people in this state who still have a difficult time using restrooms with people of different colors, which is sad in and of itself.  Sharing a bathroom facility with someone transgendered may be scary at first. I get that.  But running from those fears will not fix anything.  It will only perpetuate stereotypes based on lack of education.  Times have changed.  Situations have changed.  The types of people we all encounter on a daily basis have changed.  We will push through and continue to move forward so that all of us come out better people.  And by all of us, I do mean ALL of us.  Growth is a group effort.
     And, please, do not start spouting Bible verses at me.  It is ignorant and shameful to single out several passages that apply a group of people while ignoring all of the passages that apply to you.  And if you do not understand why that is wrong, I suggest you pick up the Good Book and read it again, or possibly for the first time.
     Your actions on Wednesday angered and upset me but I cannot say that I was all that surprised at it.  Today, you are just another bully on the playground and I've been fighting bullies my entire life.  And guess what?  I stood up for myself and I'm still here.  I will stand up to you, too, and I know that I will not be alone in that.  I live here and have no intentions of leaving anytime soon.  North Carolina is my home.  It is in my blood.  But living here is no longer a privilege.  It is simply where I live right now and nothing more.  That makes me sad.
     North Carolina, you have potential.  Do not let ignorance and greed take control of your emotions.  If you do, one day you will look around and everyone will have left you in the dust.  We are already one of the worst states for education.  Let's not be that way for humanity.  You can do better than that.  You deserve better than that.  We all deserve better than that.  Good manners go a long way.  Find that again and let's progress forward.

That is all.

Very concerned,

Bob