I don't mind helping out at work wherever I'm needed. If you as most of the people that I work with, they will tell you that is true. Just last night I helped out in the dining room because they were a little short staffed. I had a good time, as I always do in the dining room. I feel like I have a good work ethic. I understand that the most important thing we can do as a team is to make sure that our residents' lives are as stress free as possible. That's why I will do almost anything that is asked of me. I live and work for my residents those 8 hours every day that I am at work.
But I have come to truly realize during this chaotic time in my life that I often spread myself too thin by doing too much. While I don't think that my overall productivity suffers from that, I do believe that my mental health has. I really don't know how to define myself at work anymore. I've gotten myself into a position where, in many ways, I have become irreplaceable. If they were to hire another CSR to take my place, chances are that person is not going to be asked to do 90% of what I do on a daily basis. Those tasks would return to the departments where they originated.
It's definitely a double-edged sword. While I am honored that those above me trust me with these tasks, I also wonder if I get them because no one else will or wants to do them? I guess, in the end, it doesn't matter because things need to get done and I see that they do. It simply makes me ask what about my job now has anything to do with the job I was hired to do. Is it ok for me to say no? I know that I have every right to refuse things that are out of my realm, but I rarely do because I know it's for the good of my residents. Ah, well.
Anyway, this is a good learning experience for me. I know that wherever I end up next, I am going to keep closer tabs on myself and not become that go to person that is both reliable and yet expendable. That is all.
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